'I wish I had spoken about my sexuality years ago'

Sophie McKinna is simply a six-time nationalist changeable put champion who represented Team GB astatine nan Tokyo 2020 Olympics and has contested world, European and Commonwealth finals. Last year, she chose to speak publically astir her sexuality for nan first time. As portion of BBC Sport's Pride Month series, she shares her story.

A happy jock is simply a performing athlete. Any jock will show you that.

When you are capable to beryllium yourself, to beryllium happy and free, performances follow. Last period I produced my furthest propulsion successful 2 years.

I wish I had spoken openly astir my sexuality years agone - and I'd decidedly opportunity to my younger aforesaid 'get a move on'.

I americium a wholly different personification since I first said openly [about being gay] connected The LGBT Sport Podcast successful April 2023. Now I'm nary longer worried. There's nary much paranoia. I station openly connected societal media, thing I had ne'er done previously.

It was a determination I weighed up for good complete a year. To anyone successful a akin position I would opportunity decidedly do it, don't hesitate. It was 1 of nan astir freeing experiences for me.

I ne'er consciousness for illustration I person to hide myself successful situations anymore. I nary longer person nan accent and anxiety. Myself and my partner are presently readying our wedding, which is thing I would ne'er antecedently person dreamed of saying openly because I was truthful worried astir what group would think.

I decided to speak openly astir my sexuality past twelvemonth because I was fed up of being successful nan shadows.

It was thing that was ne'er spoken about, moreover though those adjacent to maine and everyone connected nan athletics squad knew. In nan end, I realised I should beryllium capable to beryllium wholly myself erstwhile doing my job.

At nan clip I was successful a comparatively caller narration and I didn't want to hide that. Why should I consciousness arsenic though I can't stock my happiness pinch nan world? After all, athletics is arsenic overmuch astir nan group down nan scenes arsenic nan athletes themselves.

A large portion of not taking nan determination sooner was because I want to beryllium defined by my sporting performances.

That was a monolithic point for me. You should not beryllium defined by your sexuality, it has nary effect connected really acold I propulsion nan shot.

I besides lacked nan assurance to judge that I could beryllium a domiciled exemplary for group to look up to. But I was fortunate to person friends who encouraged me, supported me, and - arsenic cheesy arsenic it whitethorn sound - allowed maine to find myself.

You dread nan deficiency of support. But past you realise that, actually, you had built that up to thing it isn't. I surely made it worse successful my caput than it really was.

I was truthful concerned pinch what group extracurricular my closest bubble would think. I ever felt for illustration I had to beryllium looking complete my shoulder. Was anyone watching? Has anyone said anything?

It felt for illustration paranoia because I was truthful worried astir who would show who, and who mightiness opportunity what.

I didn't expect nan guidance I sewage astatine all. I didn't person an thought it would beryllium truthful far-reaching, because you don't needfully realise nan effect your ain communicative mightiness person connected others erstwhile you're successful nan mediate of it.

I was touched by nan messages I sewage successful response. It is successful moments for illustration that erstwhile you realise you are really a domiciled exemplary - and, by doing what you're doing, you tin animate group and unfastened doors for different group successful their ain lives.

That is measurement bigger than sport.

Visibility is massively important. I received truthful galore connection from group who still don't consciousness they tin talk openly astir their sexuality.

That is really sad because it is specified a freeing experience. But arsenic nan saying goes: 'If you can't spot it, you can't beryllium it.'

That is why, if you person a level and a voice, you should speak retired to support those group who don't yet consciousness assured capable to do it themselves.

The motorboat of nan Athletics Pride Network by British Athletics successful 2020 was immense progress. It tin bea measurement of helping young athletes especially, providing them pinch a safe space.

I'm keen to statesman activity pinch nan Athletics Pride Network that tin really thief people, to let them to consciousness free and beryllium themselves without immoderate judgement.

I want group to beryllium capable to acquisition nan aforesaid emotion I person now and to realise it's not really specified a scary point to talk about.

It takes a colony to build an jock and I dream to repay nan group who person supported maine by competing astatine Paris 2024 this summer.

I didn't want to perchance springiness nan capacity of my life astatine nan Olympics but not beryllium capable to observe pinch nan group that I love. I didn't want that looking-over-the-shoulder emotion immoderate more.

The much openly cheery group who usage their level to speak astir it, nan much younger group successful athletics and beyond are going to consciousness comfortable having those conversations.

I wanted to beryllium capable to person that effect connected people, to fto them cognize I had a really affirmative acquisition and, while I judge I'm fortunate successful that sense, you tin person that too.

That is nan biggest point I want to travel from this, for group to consciousness comfortable successful their ain tegument and beryllium free to unrecorded their lives really they choose.

Sophie McKinna was speaking to BBC Sport's Harry Poole.