Keeping children safe on social media: What parents should know to protect their kids

Barbara Ortutay, Associated Press

WASHINGTON (AP) — At what property should kids beryllium connected societal media? Should they beryllium connected it astatine all? If they aren’t, will they beryllium societal pariahs? Should parents show their conversations? Do parental controls work?

Navigating societal media arsenic a genitor — not to mention a kid — is not easy. Using societal media platforms is still nan default for astir American teenagers, pinch nan Pew Research Center reporting that 58% of teens are regular users of TikTok, including 17% who picture their TikTok usage arsenic almost constant. About half of teens usage Snapchat and Instagram daily, pinch near-constant usage astatine 14% and 8% for each, respectively.

But parents — and moreover immoderate teens themselves — are increasing progressively concerned astir nan effects of societal media usage connected young people. Lawmakers person taken announcement and person held aggregate legislature hearings connected kid online safety. But moreover pinch evident bipartisan unity, making laws and regulating companies takes time. So far, nary regularisation has passed.

What are parents — and teens — expected to do successful nan meantime? Here are immoderate tips connected staying safe, communicating and mounting limits connected societal media — for kids arsenic good arsenic their parents.

IS 13 THE MAGIC AGE FOR SOCIAL MEDIA?

There’s already, technically, a norm that prohibits kids nether 13 from utilizing platforms that advertise to them without parental consent: The Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act that went into effect successful 2000, earlier today’s teenagers were moreover born.

The extremity was to protect kids’ online privateness by requiring websites and online services to disclose clear privateness policies and get parents’ consent earlier gathering individual accusation connected their kids, among different things. To comply, societal media companies person mostly banned kids nether 13 from signing up for their services.

But times person changed, and online privateness is nary longer nan only interest erstwhile it comes to kids being online. There’s bullying, harassment, nan consequence of processing eating disorders, suicidal thoughts aliases worse.

For years, location has been a push among parents, educators and tech experts to hold to springiness children phones — and entree to societal media — until they are older, specified arsenic nan “Wait Until 8th” promise that has parents motion a promise not to springiness their kids a smartphone until nan 8th grade, aliases astir property 13 aliases 14. Some hold moreover later, for illustration 16 aliases 17.

But neither societal media companies nor nan authorities person done thing actual to summation nan property limit.

IF THE LAW WON’T BAN KIDS, SHOULD PARENTS?

“There is not needfully a magical age,” said Christine Elgersma, a societal media master astatine nan nonprofit Common Sense Media. But, she added, “13 is astir apt not nan champion property for kids to get connected societal media.”

The laws presently being projected see broad bans connected nan under-13 group erstwhile it comes to societal media. The problem? There’s nary easy measurement to verify a person’s property erstwhile they motion up for apps and online services. And nan apps celebrated pinch teens coming were created for adults first. Companies person added immoderate safeguards complete nan years, Elgersma noted, but these are piecemeal changes, not basal rethinks of nan services.

“Developers request to commencement building apps pinch kids successful mind,” she said.

Some tech executives, celebrities specified arsenic Jennifer Garner and parents from each walks of life person resorted to banning their kids from societal media altogether. While nan determination is simply a individual 1 that depends connected each kid and parent, immoderate experts opportunity this could lead to isolating kids, who could beryllium near retired of activities and discussions pinch friends that return spot connected societal media aliases chat services.

Another hurdle — kids who person ne'er been connected societal media whitethorn find themselves ill-equipped to navigate nan platforms erstwhile they are abruptly allowed free rein nan time they move 18.

TALK, TALK, TALK

A much realistic and effective attack to societal media, experts say, is simply a slow, deliberate onboarding that gives children nan devices and accusation they request to navigate a world successful which places for illustration TikTok, Instagram and Snapchat are almost intolerable to escape.

“You cannot conscionable expect that nan kids will jump into nan world of societal media, study really to aquatics connected their own,” said Natalie Bazarova, a professor of communications and head of nan Cornell Social Media Lab. “They request to person instruction.”

Start early, earlier than you think. Elgersma suggests that parents spell done their ain societal media feeds pinch their children earlier they are aged capable to beryllium online and person unfastened discussions connected what they see. How would your kid grip a business wherever a friend of a friend asks them to nonstop a photo? Or if they spot an article that makes them truthful angry they conscionable want to stock it correct away?

For older kids, Elgersma says to attack them pinch curiosity and interest, “asking astir what their friends are doing aliases conscionable not asking nonstop questions like, ‘What are you doing connected Instagram?’ but rather, ‘Hey, I heard this influencer is really popular.’” And moreover if your kid rolled their eyes it could beryllium a window.”

Don’t opportunity things for illustration “Turn that point off!” erstwhile your kid has been scrolling for a agelong time, says Jean Rogers, nan head of nan nonprofit Fairplay’s Screen Time Action Network.

“That’s not respectful,” Rogers said. “It doesn’t respect that they person a full life and a full world successful that device.”

Instead, Rogers suggests asking them questions astir what they do connected their phone, and spot what your kid is consenting to share.

Kids are besides apt to respond to parents and educators “pulling backmost nan curtains” connected societal media and nan sometimes insidious devices companies usage to support group online and engaged, Elgersma said. Watch a documentary for illustration “The Social Dilemma” that explores algorithms, acheronian patterns and dopamine feedback cycles of societal media. Or publication up pinch them really Facebook and TikTok make money.

“Kids emotion to beryllium successful nan cognize astir these things, and it will springiness them a consciousness of power,” she said.

SETTING LIMITS

Rogers says astir parents person occurrence pinch taking their kids’ phones overnight to limit their scrolling. Occasionally kids mightiness effort to sneak nan telephone back, but it’s a strategy that tends to activity because kids request a break from nan screen.

“They request to an excuse pinch their peers to not beryllium connected their telephone astatine night,” Rogers said. “They tin blasted their parents.”

Parents whitethorn request their ain limits connected telephone use. Rogers said it’s adjuvant to explicate what you are doing erstwhile you do person a telephone successful manus astir your kid truthful they understand you are not aimlessly scrolling done sites for illustration Instagram. Tell your kid that you’re checking activity email, looking up a look for meal aliases paying a measure truthful they understand you’re not connected location conscionable for fun. Then show them erstwhile you scheme to put nan telephone down.

WHAT ABOUT PARENTAL CONTROLS?

Social media platforms that cater to children person added an ever-growing array of parental controls arsenic they look expanding scrutiny complete kid safety. For instance, Meta unveiled parental supervision devices past twelvemonth that lets parents group clip limits, spot who their kid follows aliases is followed by, and allows them to way really overmuch clip nan insignificant spends connected Instagram. It does not fto parents spot connection content.

But arsenic pinch akin devices connected different platforms specified arsenic TikTok, nan characteristic is optional, and some kids and parents person to work together to usage it. In bid to nudge kids toward agreeing to group up nan controls, Instagram sends a announcement to teens aft they artifact someone, encouraging them to fto their parents “supervise” their account. The thought is to drawback kids’ attraction erstwhile they mightiness beryllium much unfastened to parental guidance.

By making nan characteristic optional, Meta says it is trying to “balance teen information and autonomy” arsenic good arsenic punctual conversations betwixt parents and their children.

Such features tin beryllium useful for families successful which parents are already progressive successful their child’s online life and activities. Experts opportunity that’s not nan reality for galore people.

U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy said past twelvemonth it’s unfair to expect parents to negociate what their children do pinch quickly evolving exertion that “fundamentally changes really their kids deliberation astir themselves, really they build friendships, really they acquisition nan world — and technology, by nan way, that anterior generations ne'er had to manage.”

Putting each of that connected nan shoulders of parents, he said, “is conscionable simply not fair.”