My husband wants us each to put 5% of what we earn into a spending fund but he will have more than me. Is this fair?

Dear Dave,

My hubby and I some activity extracurricular nan home, and he has travel up pinch an thought for our nosy money. He wants america to group up an relationship wherever we some put 5% of our net for discretionary spending. The rumor successful my mind is that he would person a batch much to spend, because he makes overmuch much money than I do. He says he feels he should beryllium capable to walk much since he makes more. I’m not a greedy person, and I don’t walk money connected a batch of frivolous things, but I do deliberation things would beryllium even. I consciousness we should each put successful nan aforesaid dollar amount—one that’s adjacent to some of us—if we’re going to do this. What do you think?

Val

Dear Val,

This isn’t a bully plan. I’m judge your hubby intends well, and that he’s really a bully feline overall, but it sounds to maine for illustration he astir apt hasn’t thought this full point through. As they guidelines now, nan specifications of his thought play retired arsenic beautiful immature and selfish. And thing tells maine you wouldn’t wed a man for illustration that.

Think astir it this way. There are plentifulness of families retired location wherever only 1 personification useful extracurricular nan location and generates an existent income. Would it beryllium adjacent to opportunity that whoever brings location nan paycheck is nan only 1 who tin person nosy spending erstwhile successful a while? Of course, not! In astir cases, spouses who don’t activity extracurricular nan location return connected tons of work and execute respective things each azygous day—especially if nan mates has kids. If you put a monetary magnitude connected each that, it’d upwind up being a beautiful bully income dollars-wise.

Remember backmost erstwhile you 2 sewage married? If it were thing adjacent to a accepted ceremony, I’ll stake nan preacher pronounced you 2 “as one.” As successful each point and each way. That intends you person 1 income, a mixed income, and it’s our income. If you ain a home, it’s our home. It’s not much his location conscionable because he makes much money than you. Our kids, our matrimony our everything. Get nan picture?

Marriage is not a maine proposition. It should ever beryllium a we thing. Your hubby needs to beryllium reminded of that.

—Dave